How can I be a "Good Christian" in the 21st century?

Cross posting from another conversation thread... 

To your question, "...should it be easy to be a good Christian?" I posit a thought to add to your musing. 

I've spent the last five years studying the Ancient Near East and Second Temple Judaism contexts of the biblical authors. One of the fascinating shifts was away from a Jewish mentality of focusing on "Orthopraxy" (right practice) to a Gentile mentality of focusing on "Orthodoxy" (right belief). It is my thesis at this point in my journey that this shift fundamentally broke the Gentile western Church. From the very beginning, we took a wrong turn by doing this.

I find it interesting that so many of us who grew up in modern western Churchianity find ourselves asking what we need to "do" to be a "good Christian"? 

That was the question Jewish believers were asking themselves in the first century AD. Go read the gospels and stop thinking of the Pharisees as Jesus' adversaries and instead see them as his peers (not an inter faith debate, but an intra faith debate). This was inside baseball, this was rabbi to rabbi... Jesus was recognized as a Rabbi by the Pharisees. This wasn't a Jesus against the Jewish Rabbis debate they were having, this is Jewish Rabbi Jesus saying, "This is how you be a Torah observant Jew" and the other Jewish Rabbis saying, "But what about this practice? What about what Rabbi Shammai? What about Rabbi Hillel? Why should be "Good Jews" your way?" 

When the Gentiles first came to The Way of Rabbi Yeshua, they didn't ask what doctrines they should believe to be part of the family. They asked "what should they be required to DO?" Abstain from blood, don't eat meat.... etc." 

They were asking how Gentiles can come to a Jewish sect without becoming fully Torah observant Jews. In other words, the entire New Testament exists to answer "How can I be a Good Christian?" not to answer "What Doctrines should I believe?" 

It was about practice, not doctrines.

While I cannot do much to change anyone else's mind about that, I find myself in 2025 looking not to what churches have the right doctrinal statements, but rather, HOW they live. If a person or group claims to be a follower of Jesus, I look to see if they are

• feeding the hungry,
• giving water to the thirsty,
• welcoming and providing hospitality to the stranger/traveler/immigrant,
• working with the Sick to bring healing or relieve pain,
• vising those in prison.... (Matthew 25).

If they're doing that kind of stuff, or stuff in that general direction... they're a "Good Christian" and if they aren't they're not (regardless of they claim to hold on their "We Believe" pages on their website). 

I might get more nuanced in the future, but that's where I'm sitting with that question today. 

Shalom שָׁלוֹם: Live Long and Prosper!

Darrell Wolfe

Storyteller | Writer | Thinker | Consultant | Freelancer | Bible Nerd *Written withs some editing and research assistance from ChatGPT-4o

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Class Assignment: Case 5.1: The Unwanted Pregnancy

Case 5.1: The Unwanted Pregnancy

Background:

For Christian Ethics class, we had to read a case study and discuss how we would respond. I decided this would be an interesting practical class assignment to include on the NO HIDING FAITH Website because while I wish this response were typical for all pastors everywhere, the fact is my response is probably more rare than common. 

Note: Responses edited for the website.

Consider the following a case-specific example of my template for Pastoral Counseling and the relationships we should build with our people (in and out of the Yeshua communities).

Case Study

For reference, I have included the textbook case study. 

Case 5.1: The Unwanted Pregnancy

You are the college pastor for your church, and this afternoon you have had a counseling appointment with one of your students and her parents. She is new to your ministry, having recently come to faith in Christ, and her parents do not attend your church. They are distraught with her pregnancy, and you are too, since she is pregnant by one of the young men in your college ministry. They have known each other for roughly six months and are seeing each other exclusively.

They are coming for your counsel on abortion. They are considering facilitating a pregnancy termination and want to know your opinion. Since the parents do not attend your church and are likely not Christians, it is unlikely that they recognize any authority to Scripture.

Questions for Discussion

          1.      What will you tell your student and her parents about the decision to end the pregnancy?

          2.      How would you defend your advice to the couple from the Bible? How, if at all, would you articulate your view to the girl’s parents differently, since they don’t appear to have much appreciation for the authority of the Bible?

          3.      Would you advise the couple to get married? Be sure to explain your reasons for your view on this question.

          4.      Assuming that they do not terminate the pregnancy and do not get married, would you advise the girl to put the baby up for adoption? Why or why not?

Scott B. Rae, Moral Choices: An Introduction To Ethics, Third Edition (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2009), 149–150.

My Response:

THE KING’S UNIVERSITY (TKU)

READING RESPONSES

READING RESPONSES SUBMITTED TO PROFESSOR DR. JAMES PATRICK GIRDLESTONE FOR CHRISTIAN ETHICS (PHIL2301).

BY

DARRELL WOLFE

DARRELL.WOLFE@STUDENT.TKU.EDU

SOUTHLAKE, TEXAS, ONLINE VIA NORTH POLE, IDAHO

SPRING 2022

WEEK FOUR

    As I understand this exercise, I am supposed to review the case and provide my answers to the worksheet questions. I chose Case 5.1: The Unwanted Pregnancy (149-150). 

Preface: 

    As a family, they may be having a range of possible emotional responses from shame about the situation, anger at the young man or even the church since he is involved there, fear over the unknown, guilt that they are considering an abortion, and a host of other emotions. 

    Long before we dispense with advice or diagnostics or any progress forward. I want to begin by asking them to share their story, talk about how they are feeling, see the reaction/nonreaction in my presence, and ensure them they are in a safe space to have this discussion. I also want to ensure that they know we are all (all humans) broken and messy, and that’s one of the beautiful parts of the ministry of Yeshua is that he comes to us in our brokenness. Therefore, I will walk through this next season with them regardless of what decision they make. Their future acceptance of the Kingdom demands that I not make my continued presence in their life contingent on this difficult decision.

    Also, I take a stance against the way these text questions are worded. Pastoral Counselors should not be giving “advice” or “telling them what to do”. We can guide but never demand. And when was the last time you heard of “giving advice” going well? They’re almost sure to do the opposite of whatever you say unless it is their idea and they own the final decision.

Diagnostics from the text:

1. What will you tell your student and her parents about the decision to end the pregnancy?

    I would begin with questions to gauge their thoughts about the value of life (in general) and have them think through what makes a human being a full-fledged human being with rights? 

    I would walk them backward from terminating the life of a three-year-old child, two, one, one day after birth, one hour after birth, ten minutes after birth, while it is being born, ten minutes before birth, etc... and then ask them how they differentiate the "right to life" at each stage? 

    I would also help them ask their own questions about the decision: 

• What do you know about human biology and the procedure you are about to endure? 
• What do you believe about life, in general? 
• What options have you considered in addition to the Abortion? 
• What would it look like to follow through with keeping and raising the child? 
• What would it look like to go through with an abortion? 
• What would it look like if you carried to term but gave it up for adoption to a family who desperately wants a child but cannot have one (could this be a ministry opportunity for that family)? 
• Etc…

2. How would you defend your advice to the couple from the Bible? How, if at all, would you articulate your view to the girl’s parents differently, since they don’t appear to have much appreciation for the authority of the Bible?

    The Bible is my source of wisdom, even if it is not theirs. But I can meet them where they are. If the girl and parents are both not believers (as the text implies), I would likely appeal on human-grounds, and not biblical ones, unless the topic came up, I was asked directly, or the Spirit prompted. 

    The Torah is written on our hearts, people know killing is wrong when faced with the decision on human grounds. Though a parable can help, from time to time.

3. Would you advise the couple to get married? Be sure to explain your reasons for your view on this question.

    Unlikely! Marriage for the sake of pregnancy is almost certainly compounding mistakes and making the problem worse. 

    However, if the couple decided to keep the baby and raise it together, and they were interested in marriage; I would walk them through some intense pre-marital counseling and request they wait for one year of meetings with me before making that decision. 

God is more interested in human hearts than institutions.

4. Assuming that they do not terminate the pregnancy and do not get married, would you advise the girl to put the baby up for adoption? Why or why not?

    I don't give advice (try not to anymore). 

    I ask questions that uncover the individual’s own moral grounding and help them come to a decision that is within their cognitive framework. 

    As stated above, I will help her consider all options and the ramifications of those options and make a decision that aligns with her will, emotions, and intuitive sense. 

    Hopefully, I will have earned the right to walk with her through various seasons of her life (regardless of the specific outcomes) and mentor/disciple her into a better and healthier future than may have otherwise been the case.

Darrell Wolfe

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